How to Love A Saved Man

In Part 2 of Nightline's "Why Successful Black Women can't Find a Man," Hill Harper argues that misinformation is destroying the black families. In Harper's book, he found that there is a great deal of misinformation...that women are sharing this among each other. He also said that men do the same thing using the example that men don't usually talk about being happy in marriage, but he found in polling men that most married men ARE INDEED HAPPY!

Looking at just the example Harper is speaking of...women do the same thing. We talk about the negatives of marriage before we get to the positive. This is why it is important for us to make sure that we are linking ourselves with Godly men. Men who have to answer to God for how we are treated and then we can talk about the great things marriage can bring.

I've been married going on four years, and my husband and I came together with a blended family. I will not lie, marriage is not easy. Relationships take work, but there is nothing sweeter then being able to look at my best friend before I go to sleep, and to see him the moment I wake up.

Nightline recently aired a special called "Why Can't Successful Black Women Can't Find A Man?"  The panel was filled with celebrities such as Steve Harvey, Hill Harper, Sherri Shepherd, and Jacque Reid.  The video below is the first part of the series  Jimi Izrael, author of "The Denzel Principle" gave his reason for why successful black women can't find a man as being that women are wanting something that they are not.  "You're looking for a man that is perfect and you're not perfect."  


Sherri Shepherd countered by saying that her standards aren't too high, that she is looking for someone that believes in God, someone that can "help take my cornrows out."


Take a look...what do you think?




I think that as much as we women want to argue the issues, we are interested in knowing that heart of a man.  I found myself agreeing on some things men said, and disagreeing on them.  Number one, I think it's great to have standards, women and men alike should have standards when it comes to the people they are intimately involved with; however, I think it is a PEOPLE issue, not necessarily a WOMAN issue regarding wanting others to be perfect.


In the end what I am taking from this segment is:


1. Men are not perfect.  Though I love my husband...he is not God and he is not perfect and I shouldn't expect to be so. Expecting him to be perfect is setting him up for failure and me up for disappointment.


2. Men are visual creatures.  This is straight from the men's mouth.  Ladies, it's important that we keep ourselves looking good.  Honey, I run behind four kids, and sometimes the last thing I want to do is be glammed up, but I have pledged to try and make my appearance a priority. Not saying that he can't handle me in a pair of sweats and my hair tied up...but the last thing I want him to forget is the Diva that he is with!

When I first saw the title of the video I thought to myself "this is interesting," and I must admit that I decided to watch it just for kicks. After viewing it, I realized that "yes" men are like waffles and we are indeed like the famous italian cuisine known as spaghetti.  At least, this is the way it is in my household. My husband tends to be very focused and works systematically, and God bless him, he has learned how to deal with the way I think which is 1000 miles a minute!